There isn’t a strong chance for a movie called The Only Living Boy in New York not to be pretentious and terrible, and this one…does not take it. It is bad. It is over-written and under-directed, boring and vacuous.

MV5BODEzODA5NjU2NF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwODkwNzA5MjI@._V1_UX182_CR0,0,182,268_AL_The titular Boy is Thomas Webb–always Thomas, of course, never Tom–and he is played by Callum Turner, which is how you know he’s going to swan about looking like a Romantic poet and probably seduce an older woman. He’d like to be a writer, but his father (Pierce Brosnan) is in publishing and has crapped all over his dreams. His mother (Cynthia Nixon) keeps her moods in balance chemically and throws dinner parties with insufferable people (inexplicably played by proper actors such as Tate Donovan, Debi Mazar, and Wallace Shawn, I have no idea why). Thomas also has a crush on a hipster nymph, Mimi (Kiersey Clemons), who is dating a guy in a band but enjoys keeping Thomas on the hook. They are both unbearable, so maybe they deserve each other.

There is a wise old recluse who lives in Thomas’s building: Jeff Bridges, playing someone whose name doesn’t matter, and who is so hackneyed it’s almost hard to believe. He understands love, he understands writing, he is the father Thomas always wanted–it beggars belief and induces nausea.

But it gets worse! Thomas’s dad is having an affair with a beautiful woman, Johanna (Kate Beckinsale). And Thomas finds out, so he has an affair with her too. No one makes any sense. No one is trying not to be the worst.

The writing is inhuman, the pacing is nonsensical, and it’s just…bad.

Director: Marc Webb
Rating: R
Length: 89 minutes
Score: 1/5

Advertisements

0 Comments Post your own or leave a trackback: Trackback URL

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: